Barney Stinson

[The feed clicks on, the image shaky as it sounds like there's some commotion going on. It's hard to make out what's going on until the gear clatters to the floor and looks up at the roof. It's Barney's office, clearly, but it looks like there's a windstorm going on. And you might be able to see red and brown and purple blurs flying around.]

Robin, stop! Stop! Ted, no, don't use that!

[And all of a sudden, there's a blast of water, that really just succeeds in making everything wet. There are still blurs flying around. And to make a long story short? A angry ledyba found it's way into the Goldenrod Radio Tower. And after causing chaos in the lobby, found it's way into Barney's office. And of course the door closed so Barney's trying to deal with it. With a pidgey using gust and a Shuppet just having fun making a mess and a totodile just trying to help and poor Barney in the middle of it all not sure what to do. Until he finally gets an idea. Which involves coming out from under his desk, jumping on top of it, and grabbing the ledyba as it goes by. He falls to the ground, and you will now be treated to a few minutes of man vs. pokemon with the man clearly losing. At least until all his pokemon hit it with an attack. Barney lies there for a bit with the knocked out pokemon before sitting up.]

What the hell got into this thing? I've never seen one this mad, and coming into a building. I mean, even when I fought that....

Oh for the love of-- the stupid thing's ruined my suit! And this was my better suit to! Now what am I supposed to wear?

[and all previous thoughts are forgotten as we must deal with this outrage]

[The feed clicks on, although Barney isn't really paying attention, so you can't really see much except for the sky, and maybe Barney's leg occasionally. You can also hear some humming. Sound familiar? Yeah, It's a Small World has been stuck in his head since Wednesday. He's been trying to get it unstuck, and failing, so now he's trying to reinvent the tune to fit the background music. Not going so well.

However, Barney's pretty chipper right now. He's out of bed and over his cold, and he's managed to make some money working at the Pokemon Center for the past week. He's bought himself a nice track suit, because obviously suits don't belong in the woods and he needs to save them for Goldenrod. So now he's out on Route 32 to investigate something.

While he did promise to meet Smoker in Azalea for drinks, the promise of Goldenrod has lured him, and after looking at the map, he should be able to get there quite easily from Violet. Why is everyone going around? Obviously, he has to go figure this out. So he's at the Sudowoodo crossing now]

That's it? People are going around because of a tree? Lame. Ted, take it out.

[The Totodile rises to the challenge. Barney has learned, after several water guns to the face, just how powerful his little croc can be. Ted unleashes a wave of of water, which hits the tree. Which turns around, glaring at Barney. And launches himself at him. Not at the pokemon. At Barney]

SUDOWOODO!!!!

[The pokegear flies off to the side, but is soon righted by Ted, who is now recording the ensuing battle. And for a city boy who is much more a lover than a fighter, Barney's putting up a pretty good fight. He's getting cheered on by his other pokemon, except for Robin the Pidgey, who's just ashamed, and his Shuppet, who's pretty amused by his trainer right now. Sentret and Ted are supportive though, and gibberish is appearing on the bottom of the screen as Ted attempts to blog this.

Finally Barney manages to get away, and grabs a pokeball, hoping to make another capture. No dice. The pokeball goes back to Barney, who catches it with his face and promptly faints. The Sudowoodo goes back to where it was standing in a huff. There's a stunned silence]

[Finally Barney wakes up]

What the hell was that thing? Feels like  I was hit by another bus.