usedsuitup | Entry 14 [text, we're blogging here]

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Entry 14 [text, we're blogging here]

Well Readers, another year come and gone. Hard to believe we've reached 2009 already. [yes, it is 2009 for him]

Of course I didn't expect spending half of it stuck in a video game from the 90's. I'd like to say that stranger things have happened, but that really isn't the case. Looking back, I figure this may be some sort of punishment for me, but I think I deserve some forgiveness now. I already got hit by a bus.

Still, this world isn't bad. I mean, I finally made it to Goldenrod City, which is actual civilization. Streets, cars, skyscrapers, a bar, a casino. This place is awesome. And the girls here aren't that bad. Speaking of which, Junpei, 45, plus I scored with the Nurse Joy here, so 46.

I always like to have a resolution or two for the New Year. This year, I think I'll resolve to meet more of you lovely ladies on the network. And be awesome. Oh wait. I already am.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Is 2009 the local year? Were I in my own world, it would have been 2016 with the new year.

I do not understand the point of your resolution, or your scoring system.

2016? Seriously? I knew there were people from the past, but not the future. Where are you from?

The scoring system was part of a bet. As for the resolution, it's a New Years tradition! You choose something to either stop doing to get better at and work at it throughout the year.

The past and future are relative to one's own sense of time. I am from Tokyo-3.

A strange bet. Let me rephrase my question: why would you make a resolution to meet more women?

Wasn't aware there was a one or a two.

Well, I haven't met a whole lot since coming here. And since meeting women's kinda what I do...

Perhaps not in your world.

It seems a strange purpose. However, speaking to me may help to fulfill it, as I am female.

[...And not the kind of woman he means, but she doesn't quite get his implications. Oh, to be as socially awkward as Rei.]

That would mean more than one Earth.

That so? In that case, what's your name? I'm Barney.

Correct. That much is presumable from the difference in years, unless your world also experienced Second Impact.

My name is Rei Ayanami.

Can't say we did, unless it was me, what up?

Nice to meet you Rei.

I do not understand your meaning.

Well, you see [pause, he's trying to explain it but something tells him it won't work] Actually, never mind.

So, have you been here long, Rei?

[Pretty much.]

About three weeks.

Oh, so pretty recently then. How are you liking it?

I think

I may prefer it to my own world.

2009? Are you sure you're not mistaken?

Pretty sure. It was 2008 when I left New York and ended up here.

2008? Does one person rule the world yet?

Nope, though my company's making a bid for it.

Which company is that? Is it Extensive Enterprises?

[if smugness can be present through a text, it is here]

Goliath National Bank, actually.

[Since he can't convey his shock and outrage through text, the voice function is turned on.]

We must be from different worlds! There's no other possible explanation as to why I don't control the world by the year 2009!

Maybe so. [He doesn't quite get the multiple worlds thing] Who are you, anyway?

I am Cobra Commander! Feel free to swear your allegiance and loyalty now while you still can!

[Long pause. He gets the feeling that laughing at this guy isn't a good idea so he's trying to hold it in. Barney Stinson swears allegiance to no one]

What'll happen if I don't? Just checking out all my options here.

If you don't, you will regret it!

[Still trying not to laugh]

And if I do?

I won't destroy you unless you give me reason to do so!

Dude. It's 2020 for me!

...Seriously? What's the future like? Are there flying cars?

Man, I wish.

It's really not too different than it was back then.

Lame. You'd think by 2020 they'd have at least gotten to flying cars.

2009?! I'm from 1950!

Really? All the way back then?

Y... Yeah. Well, 1951 now, I guess...

Guess there's some weird time thing going on. Like a science fiction movie or something.

Thanks for the autograph by the way.

Aww, it was nothing compared to what I got from you.

Heh, glad you liked it.

Of course!

Maybe they'll show up one day.

Do you think they'd all show up together?

[Have a snort at the bus comment. Really, that's it?]

Goldenrod, eh? I'll be there soon, myself.

[Well, there's some other stuff about almost ruining his relationship with his best friend and finding out he has a crush on said best friend's ex-girlfriend and sleeping with her but we're not talking about that. Instead, have a self-assured grin]

It's a nice place. You new here?

_{[THAT'S OKAY, IT'S 2009 FOR HEATHER TOO.]

[And she is currently tuning in to see what Barney thought of his GORGEOUS new suit.]}

Was my gift satisfactory?

[pause, collecting his thoughts]

Yes and no. While the make is good, and I do commend you for that, I believe you need to re-learn the definition of the word suit.

_{[You see that grin spreading across her face? That is a troll grin.]}

It is a suit.

You weren't very specific when you asked, so I figured...

[This is something he takes very seriously]
Yes, it is a suit, but it's not the kind of suit I mean when I say suit.

[pointing at his current garb

This is a suit. And when I say suit, this is what I mean.

Well, you shoulda specified.

I did. I said Suit.

Suit on it's own means Suit. Not clown suit, or scuba suit, or sweat suit, or snow suit, just suit.

That's news to me!

Say 'fancy suit' next time or something.

I'll just say suit. A fancy suit indicates a tuxedo. You don't wear tuxedos on a regular basis. Suits are suits.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Entry 14 [text, we're blogging here]

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